new

So this is what is new with me…. God took me into a complete world wind of break downs. One of them being, like every other girl on the planet, beauty. Not saying that i will never struggle with this again, but for the time being, i’m actually content. I started on this on-going journey to find myself beautiful practically at birth. I never was skinny enough, my hair was never smooth, long, straight, curly, enough, if i wanted to look one way, … i would look the exact opposite. So i put on this face of ” i don’t give a ..” on the topic of looks to hide my discomfort and shame for myself. On the inside, i was dying to feel “pretty”. I like to call this my “awkward stage” in life. That so horribly lasted until half way through high school. High school was when i really started seeking God. Not saying i was perfect by any means. I had my falls, and i had my mistakes. Soon enough, it clicked. The whole “God” thing. What he did, what he saved me from, how he sees me, everything. Now, trust me, I still struggle with this every now and then.. when i hear the devil in my ear telling me that it’s all a lie, and someone like that couldn’t possibly love someone like me. But he does, and the awesome part about it, is that he always will. 

The more I would seek God, the more comfortable i felt with myself. Which i what i longed for so long in my life. Most recently, this is what I have come to understand and live: 1) I am beautiful because God says so. 2) I have a lot to offer, every girl does. Not for one second should we lower out selfs to think any other way. 3) Make yourself happy with your beauty, and not the world. <- [ this i have had fun with, now that i am not focused on dressing a certain way for this guy or that guy, I dress how i want to, whether that means, rolling out of bed because i woke up late and being content with no make up or pulling out that bright red lipstick and having fun with it.] 4) Once you view yourself as God’s and His alone. Your whole perspective turns upside down… for the better. 

That’s my spill for the day. I hope you all know that you are beautiful and deserve to be cherished. Be happy and healthy as God intended, and once you include God in every aspect of your life (even the makeup/beauty/clothes/ part) great things can happen!

until next time….

xoxo hannah